Larry The Cable Guy: Health Inspector
Larry The Cable Guy, David Koechner, Bruce Bruce
Directed, if you can call it that, by Trent Cooper
Written in crayon by Jonathan Bernstein and James Greer
Paramount Home Video
99 minutes if you can finish it

Hollywood has finally found the solution to movie piracy: Larry The Cable Guy Health Inspector, the movie no one will ever want to copy. This piece of vile and putrid hazardous garbage makes Leonard Part 6 look like a comedy masterpiece. This sad excuse for a coaster opens with a shot of Larry The Cable Guy’s butt crack, his walking over some cold pizza, and a shot of his urinating while he takes a shower. These, by the way, are the high brow comedy moments of Health Inspector and Larry The Cable Guy’s best acting moments.

Larry The Cable Guy: Health Inspector is so low on ideas (or idears) that it inserts its first fart joke six minutes and thirty seconds into the movie. This new world record is set by a movie you will never, ever admit seeing. You would rather lie and say that not only did you sit through Gigli, It’s Pat, Glitter, and From Justin To Kelly but also bought the DVD, the deluxe DVD, and the limited edition DVD of each before you admit you watched Health Inspector.

Larry plays, if you can call it that, a health inspector who is saddled with a new partner (played by Iris Bahr in a career ending choice of material that can only be explained by hoping she took this role because she wanted funding for the kind of brain and cancer research she did while at university -thanks to IMDB for that info). They are trying to figure out who is sabotaging the city’s finest restaurants during the days leading to some kind of big fancy food competition.

I have no doubt The Razzies will soon be dubbed the Larrys after Larry The Cable Guy: Health Inspector wins every possible Razzie this year. The only way Larry The Cable Guy does not win the Razzie for worst actor is if his butthole is nominated.


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